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 Dancing with the Stars season 8 premiere

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PostSubject: Dancing with the Stars season 8 premiere   Tue Mar 10, 2009 10:00 am

After all the headlines over the last week, it was inevitable that when the Season 8 Dancing with the Stars premiere arrived, it wouldnt match the pre-season hoopla.

Only one star stormed the dance floor out of the group of thirteen, and you probably have no idea who he isforeign hunk Gilles Marini (Sex and the City). Olympian Shawn Johnson also made a good showingdespite a slip on the stairs during the intro. And the last-minute replacements for injured contestants Jewel and Nancy ODell didnt fall on their faces!

Everyone else was pretty much in the middle of the pack, with two adorably awkward trainwrecks in the caboose. And thats how it should be. This is a show where celebrities learn to dance. Weve been spoiled with unnaturally gifted ladies (Brooke Burke and Guchi-Coo) the past two seasons who were strong out of the gate and ran away with the show.

This season it looks to be a more level playing field.

Find out whos going steady and whos stumbling:

Lil Kim and Derek Hough: The Cha Cha
Black Barbie and Kenthats how Kim described herself and Derekput her swagger to good use and did a cha cha to Janet Jacksons Nasty, which she dedicated to all my girls in the Federal Detention Center. Brilliant. Kim says she watched Dancing with the Stars while she was in prison and her fellow inmates told her she should do the show. If this is any indication, this season is going to be AWESOME. Len says: First dance, first class. Is he drunk? Bruno says: Nasty but tasty. Thats a little more spot on.
Score: 21

Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts: The Waltz
I loved the Go-Gos when I was little, so when Belinda Carlisle was announced in the cast, I was excited. But as I tried to write about her performance, I couldnt remember a single thing about it. And Im sure Jonathan is a nice fella but hes kind of a bore. Between the two, it was pretty unmemorable. Brunos commentary, however, was memorable and completely uncalled for: You started out as Julie Andrews, then you turned into Cloris Leachman. And then he had the nerve to tell the audience to SHUT UP when they booed that? Is HE drunk?
Score: 17

Lawrence Taylor and Edyta Sliwinska: The Cha Cha
Lawrence Taylor is no Jason Taylor, thats for sure. LT has his work cut out for him or else hes going to break the NFL streak. His fear may have gotten the better of him in the premiere, but I wouldnt count him out yet. Carrie Ann: Did you live up to legends of the dance floor?You need to get more on the offensive, get down and dirty. Len: You have a casual approach, something natural about you. Bruno: Said somethingI didnt understand.
Score: 16

Steve-O and Lacey Schwimmer: The Waltz
I want to put my foot in the waltzs butt. Meet the dance floors first official Jackass per Bergeron. Theres something oddly charming about Steve-O, and he was up front about his stint in rehab a year ago, and that he wants to dance with the stars to prove he hasnt lost his mojo. Lacey thinks she has the biggest job for transforming someone on the show. Len said I expected much worse, so well done. Carrie Ann was mesmerized by the beauty and the awkwardness. Hmm.
Score: 17

Gilles Marini and Cheryl Burke: The Cha Cha
Uh oh. The new Cristian de la Fuente is no joke. These two are the only ones to feature that magic combo: chemistry and technique. A smoking hot dance that was sexy, fluid and performed well makes them the ones to beat so far. Bonus: If he makes it through another week, Gilles has a sexy promise for us.
Score: 24

Chuck Wicks and Julianne Hough: The Waltz
The almost perfectly perfect, stunningly gorgeous happy couple. Julianne definitely did most of the work leading her boyfriend Chuck around the dance floor, but she said she thought hed be worse. Wouldnt it be great if they broke up midseason but were forced to perform together, like Sonny and Cher? Carrie Ann: One of the most graceful men weve had on the show in long time. Len: You moved well but your posture was a bit bizarre. Bruno: You were chasing her like a whirlwind.
Score: 20

Holly Madison and Dmitry Chaplin: The Cha Cha
Holly had only five days to practice, so you have to give her credit there, even if the judges didnt. She wasnt bad, all things considering, so itll be interesting to see what shes capable of when she gets some real practice. And the Playmates rehearsal segment offered this gem of an exchange. Dmitry said it felt like he was cheating on Jewel, whom Holly replaced. And when he showed one move to Holly, she said, What do I do now? Do I just lay there? Something tells me she knows the answer to this.
Score: 18

Ty Murray and Chelsie Hightower: The Cha Cha
Are there any parts that arent embarrassing? Lets start there. What ever made Ty Murray agree to do this show? Hes shy and awkward and his cowboy hat is five times bigger than his head. Im approaching the cha cha like bull riding. Youre never completely ready. It just becomes your turn. He is kinda funny though. The new pro = meh. DWTS should stop poaching dancers from So You Think You Can Dance. Theyre not working for me. Meanwhile, the constant flirter Carrie Ann couldnt muster any commentary beyond: One cute cowboy. Hellooo, his wife Jewel is sitting on the other side of the ballroom!
Score: 14

Shawn Johnson and Mark Ballas: The Waltz
Shawn Giggles Johnson, 17, cant stop smiling and its contagious. Paired with the funny-face maker Mark Ballas, these twos facial expressions should be as much fun to watch as their dancing. Shawn, no stranger to pressure or performing, seemed the most comfortable and natural out there. While it doesnt compare to her Olympic medals, she has a very good chance of adding a silver disco ball trophy to her collection.
Score: 23

Steve Wozniak and Karina Smirnoff: The Cha Cha
Poor Karina, mismatched yet again, was at least gentle with her fuzzy teddy bear and kept her trademark eye-rolling to a minimum. The Woz, or as I like to call him Wozzy Bear, was just as terrible as we all assumed he would beexcept 10 times more adorable! Nerds can dance. He turned dance beats into mathematical equations, compared steps to digital and analog, and then needed to take five-minute thinking breaks. He stuck his tongue out while he danced and wore a pink feather boa. And he gets this years Guttenberg Award for being the happiest person in the ballroom. Len summed it up perfectly: You held my attention throughout, fascinated actually, but overall it was a disaster.
Score: 13

David Alan Grier and Kym Johnson: The Waltz
Kym doesnt get the Notorious DAGs jokes, which is, of course, funnier than his bits. Kym, always paired with the comedians, should have a better sense of humor, but maybe its lost in Australian translation? Shes adorable nonetheless, hes full of personality, and these two look like theyre going far.
Score: 19

Denise Richards and Maksim Chmerkovskiy: The Cha Cha
Well, she wasnt quite a Wild Thing but at least Denise didnt pull a Kardashian (a sexpot who failed to sizzle). She clearly was nervous and was a bit awkward at times. She also clearly has natural abilitydid you see that split?! If she can just shake that fear in her headI just know Charlie is watching and mocking meThat bastard!then she will be a contender. Bruno: Youve got it all but you dont know what to do with it. Carrie Ann: You look terrified out there.
Score: 18


Melissa Rycroft and Tony Dovolani: The Waltz
Who cares about whats his name now? Melissa can dance! But heres why we should really vote for the dumped Bachelor fiance.to keep Tony and his giant white teeth around as long as possible. With just two days to prepare his last-minute partner, Tony took all her ballet moves, put a waltz around it and there you go. I LOVE Tony Dovolani! Len: The Bachelors loss is Dancings gain. Its obvious youve danced before. Bruno: Hes a loser. You are a revelation. Carrie Ann: You are a beautiful dancer. They should always make Carrie Ann go first; when she follows Len and Brunos quips, she sounds so boring.
Score: 23

Other highlights from the season premiere:

Near catastrophe: Shawn Johnson slipped on the stairs during the cast introductions.

The first cry goes to.Denise Richards! Oh Maks, youve done it again.

Awkward Samantha Harris Moment: Every time she said to the not-so-good stars, Awe, at least you made it through

Most unintelligible Bruno-ism: Calling The Woz something like a hilarious and/or delirious teletubby at a gay pride parade

New drinking game: Every time Carrie Ann INAAABA nonsensically complains about imaginary lifts that mean nothing whatsoever, do a shot!

In danger of being the first eliminated next week: Ty, The Woz and Belinda. But first, everyone will get another chance to dance, and there will be a dance off between the bottom two couples.

Gilles and Cheryl: 24
Melissa and Tony: 23
Shawn and Mark: 23
Lil Kim and Derek: 21
Chuck and Julianne: 20
David and Kym: 19
Holly and Dmitry: 18
Denise and Maks: 18
Steve-O and Lacey: 17
Belinda and Jonathan: 17
Lawrence and Edyta: 16
Ty and Chelsie: 14
The Woz and Karina: 13

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Dancing with the Stars season 8 premiere
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